Control

In my bible study we learn a lot about control; About the illusion that we really have much control over our lives, about the downfall of people who try exert extreme control of their circumstances, and about how in the end, only God really has control over anything.

One thing I find interesting as I get older is the fact that the more control I try and exert over my situation and others, the more fearful I get of everything coming crashing down. Yet the more faith I have in God to handle those things that are out of my sphere of responsibility, the more comfort and security I feel. And so I found the following quote from Bernie Maddoff’s interview with Barbara Walters timely and fascinating.

Hey says: ”I feel safer here (in prison) than outside. I have people to talk to, no decisions to make. I know I will die in prison. I lived the last 20 years of my life in fear. Now, I have no fear because I’m no longer in control.”

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Restoration is Hard

As I mentioned in my last post, I’ve embarked on a brave journey. A journey that will surely take me to the top of frustration mountain and shove me right off the edge. I’m restoring a 26 year old motorcycle that hasn’t been ridden in years and has been left exposed to the elements for all that time.

I’m learning a lot about the art of restoration as I go through this bike. Every day is a roller coaster ride of emotion as I flip from excitement, when I think of what this bike may look like when it’s all done, to complete despair when I realize how much work needs to be put into it and how much it will cost.

Today I cleaned two more carburetors (out of four) and that felt really good. I have just one more to go and then I can actually try and start this beast and see if she runs. I think just knowing that the internals actually function will give me a real emotional boost. If she fails to work properly, well… then I need to break the engine apart, dig even deeper, and learn a whole new set of skills to get her running, but that’s both exciting and discouraging at the same time. It’s so much work, and parts are getting rare for this model.

This is the excitement of restoration. I have no training as a mechanic, but with the help of the internet I’m learning fast and it’s been incredibly rewarding. Honestly, there’s nothing like taking something that is complete crap…. I mean real crap…. dirty, rusty, nasty, abused, neglected, forgotten crap… and cleaning and polishing and working it until it’s beautiful and meaningful and cherished again. The feeling of looking at a shining piece of metal that was just a few hours ago a rusted piece of scrap is bizarrely pleasing.

Anyway, I’m only in the beginning stages of this bike restoration, but already I feel energized and excited about what this dirty, rusty piece of crap will become someday down the road. I’m determined to make her a beautiful, road worthy, piece of art. Stay tuned.

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Tinkering

Wow, it’s been a whole month since I’ve posted here. Honestly, I’m really starting to wonder if personal blogs are worth anything anymore, with Facebook so popular. I don’t know hardly anyone that has a personal blog that they actually keep up with anymore. That said, I’m going to post today anyway.

Life has been pleasingly mellow lately. Since I stepped down from the worship team at church, it’s freed up a lot of my time. A two day commitment to play at church really means at least 4 days of playing when you take into account personal and band rehearsals. So that’s been nice having that time back. Though at the same time I’ve been wondering where I will serve next. I don’t think I can just go through life living all for me again after serving for so long. I do the occasional Yerxa band gig. I do the tutoring thing on Wednesdays and that’s cool but honestly, I don’t think it’s where I really belong. So I guess I’ll keep praying and seeing where God leads me. I’m feeling it needs to be music, but there’s really nothing really tugging on me right now. Maybe time off is the thing I actually need right now.

I’ve been enjoying that time off that’s for sure. One thing I’ve really gotten into lately, and I don’t know if this is just an age thing, but I love working in my garage. I never thought I’d say that, especially 10 or 15 years ago when I was a “rock star” playing in a bar band three nights a week. But I find that being out there and tinkering on stuff is really relaxing and satisfying. So much so that I bought another motorcycle a few weeks ago just so I’d have something to work on.

This weekend I built a new workbench from some scrap I had laying around the garage and then got a storage unit so I could move some stuff out and make some room. I organized the whole place and now I’m ready to get down to some serious motorcycle tinkering! It’s going to be awesome.

Of course now I feel just like my dad, which makes me cringe since i’ve always been a bit rebellious when it comes to anything about my old man, but I think it’s inevitable that we become our parents to some degree as we age. Hopefully I’ve only inherited his good points. LOL.

Anyway, the new bike is bad ass. It’s a 1984 Kawasaki KZ700. I bought it for $350. Yes, it’s basically a jalopy. But the motor is in good shape and that’s the key. I started taking the carburetors apart this weekend and holy crap they are a disaster. the rest of the bike is pretty much a filthy rust bucket. But the great thing about old machines is that they can be restored, and usually for not a boatload of money if you’re willing to put in the work.

When I bought it, I decided I would give myself at least a year to fix it up. Just work on it a bit here and a bit there. But now that I’ve started taking it apart and making an inventory of what needs to be done, it may be more like two years. Whatever it takes though, I’m not going to rush it. I bought the bike in order to make something awesome out of something that has been neglected, and so it’s the process of the restoration that is the exciting part, not so much having another motorcycle.

I’ll be posting updates as I make progress.

 

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Where’s the Love?

Read a great article in the NY Times this morning. It’s about the declining of America and it really cuts to the core of what’s wrong with us. It’s not the political system, it’s not the economic system that’s the problem, it’s the fact that we have lost our morality, our compassion, our love for one another. And it’s because of that failing that everything else is falling apart.

America is selfish. We’re like spoiled children constantly stomping our feet and screaming about things we think we deserve. And when we feel somebody else has something we want, we will do anything to get it. We slander each other, we cheat, we bend the rules, we make back room deals, and if that doesn’t work, we sue each other. And often we don’t seem to care what the fallout is. We don’t care who will be hurt, because we “deserve” to be “happy”. We’ve “worked for” it. This selfish attitude threads itself through all economic classes, all races, all political parties, and even religions.

Why is this? I think it’s because as a society, we simply don’t know who God is and what he planned for us to be. Many of us claim to know, but often we just twist that knowledge to suit ourselves. I think if we really cracked open the bible and just read the simple teachings of Jesus, just as they appear on the paper, and then put that into daily practice, the world would change dramatically.

Here’s a passage from the Bible that I think sums it all up:

If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Which of us can say that we are truly loving? This is the world view we should be striving to imbed into the American culture. And if we can do that, everything else will sort itself out.

Here’s the link to the article in the Times:

http://www.nytimes.com/2011/09/24/us/24iht-currents24.html

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The Charismatic Church

Well, my postings on this blog have been fewer and less frequent. I think with Facebook and Twitter and stuff, personal blogs are kind of going the way of the dinosaur. So I might kill this thing soon, but until then, I have a few more things to say…..

I played a gig this weekend up at a church in the mountains. I’ve played a lot of gigs at churches over the years and unfortunately you just never know what you’re going to walk into. Some churches are really laid back and mellow, some are upbeat. Some are full of younger people and some resemble retirement homes. In a lot of ways a church is like a club. Yes, they are supposed to be all about learning about and worshipping God, but they are also a place where people gather and enjoy community, and so each one develops a personality.

In a way that’s a good thing, because people need other people to associate with, relate to, and lean on. But in another way it’s really bad, because if you’re somebody who outside the club and just trying to learn about God, that club can be a tough group to penetrate. It can also be downright alienating to walk into a room where people are used to doing things a certain way, and you have no clue what’s going on.

So that’s how it is every time I walk into a church. You just never know what the routine is going to be, if you’re going to fit in, or what’s going to be expected of you. Most of the time though that experience is, if not enjoyable, at least non eventful. My experience this weekend does not fall into either category.

There’s a segment of the Christian church that is commonly known as “charismatic”. Charismatic churches are generally distinguished by very high energy preaching (yelling), audience participation (also yelling), something called “laying on of hands”, where people touch each others heads and stuff like they are transferring some kind of energy to you, and a very unique practice called “speaking in tongues”, which is basically yelling in a made up language. That’s the kind of church we played.

All I can say is that it was two and a half hours of complete and utter discomfort. It was distracting, unnerving, and honestly, pretty creepy. Now, I’m not going to go as far as saying these people are not Godly people or anything like that. I’m not to judge, and in normal conversations I found them to be very pleasing and kind. But I have to say that once the service started, it was like somebody opened a can of crazy.

Now, charismatics will argue that the bible talks about speaking tongues and about laying on of hands, etc, etc. I would argue that those passages in the bible haven’t been taken completely out of context. I would also argue that even in the early church Paul saw this stuff going on and argued for some sanity. (1 Corinthians 14).

The real problem here though for the church going forward is that I feel these churches are going out of their way to alienate people. I simply could not imagine walking into a church like that, never having been exposed to the Christian faith, and seeing all that chaos going on. I’ve been in many churches like that and I was still extremely uncomfortable. My wife who was raised Catholic and has never experienced this was in near tears by the time I could get her out of the building. Neither of us will ever go back there, even if you paid us.

So I think every church has to ask itself; Is what we’re doing the most effective way to tell as many unbelievers as possible about God? Because that’s really the primary mission of the church. And if you’re sitting in a room with the same 15 people week after week and everyones screaming at each other in some unknown language, then maybe you’re doing something wrong.

 

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Quote of the Day

“…I am concerned about the continuing and seemingly inexorable transfer of authority from parents to the state. Not every human problem deserves a law.” – Jerry Brown

Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2011/09/07/BAEG1L1BNF.DTL#ixzz1XSoP8uM7

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The fireplace upgrade project: Complete!

What started off as a project at should have only taken a few weekends has stretched into about 6 months, but after a four day holiday weekend, it’s finally done!

The project is our fireplace upgrade. Our fireplace was still as it was when we bought our house 16 years ago. Gold trip on the doors, crappy tile surround, and a flat tile hearth. Not bad way back en, but clearly dated today. So Michelle designed a new one, and I put it in with her help.

It shouldn’t have take so long, but after finished in the hearth, I just dreaded actually putting it in. Moving a 200lb slab of concrete and laying it in place is not easy and I had to do some research to find out how to deal with a nasty crack in our foundation. That and summer vacations, etc, just pushed us way behind. But with time this weekend, and some help from my friends, We finally laid that sucker in place. Tiling the surround was fairly easy ands we knocked that out quickly.

So it’s finally done and i have to say I’m thrilled with the result. And the fact that we designed, built and installed the whole thing ourselves makes me very pleased with the outcome.

Here’s a phot of the before and after, and here’s a link to a photo gallery detailing the entire process from start to finish.

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Cool Kickstarter Projects

Just a quick note to share a few Kickstarter projects. If you’re not familiar with Kickstarter, it’s a site where creative people can start projects and ask for funding from folks on the internet. My first funding experiment, The Funklet, finished recently and I got my book of beats and it was outstanding. So I’m funding a few more projects I think are cool.

First, The 52 Cameras Project. Everyone with a smart phone has head about Instagram, the app that makes digital photos look like they were taken with cameras from the 70′s. It’s hugely popular. Well, photographer Jodi Bates has 52 old cameras and is taking pictures with each of them to create a book. Her photos are on Flickr and so far it’s pretty fantastic. She’s only $150 away from her funding goal, so go on over and drop her a few bucks and let’s see this book become a reality.

The second project is called Highway Child, and it’s going to be an art film set in the motorcycle culture of the 70′s. This one looks really cool. Everyone knows I’m a biker, and I just love the idea of this movie. I can’t wait to see it made. If you like bikes as much as I do, head on over and help them get this movie made.

Check out some of the other projects on Kickstarter as well. There’s a boatload of creative ideas out there folks, just waiting to become reality.

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Discipline

Staying healthy is probably the hardest thing I’ve ever fought with. Earlier this year I was on a super health kick, I was at 190lbs and really getting strong. Then something happened. I don’t know what it was because it happened so slowly, but over the course of about 6 months I inched up to 200lbs and my workouts decreased to about two a week.

Sad.

It’s just so freaking hard to keep fit. But It’s hard not because of society, or genetics or any of that. It’s because of simple lack of discipline. I know what I need to do to stay fit, but I make tiny exceptions here and there, and then over time those exceptions congeal to become large problems, like 10lbs of weight I don’t want.

Take today; I went to the cafeteria and even though I work at a hospital the options were fried fish and chips, pizza, calzones, BBQ’d something or other, and a weight watchers chicken wrap. Now, I could have eaten the chicken wrap, but instead I told myself that one calzone is not going to hurt. Damn it.

That may seem like a petty example, but I sit here wondering, if I can’t even control something simple, like what I stuff in my face, how many other areas in my life am I making exceptions in? My spirituality? My work life? My personal relationships? And how long do I have before they pile up and become trouble?

 

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Epic Ride 2011 Recap

Well, the Epic Ride of 2011 is now complete! What a great time! I’m not going to go into daily detail like I did on my 2010 ride, because there’s far less to cover, but I’ll talk about some of the high points.

My 2010 ride was all about reaching a goal. I wanted to ride from one end of the country to the other, and I wanted to really experience some of the differences in culture throughout the country. For 2011, I wanted to go to a different country, taking my bike across the border. But also I wanted to see a lot of people I hadn’t seen for a while. So this trip was much more about people, than setting a mileage goal. This trip was also much more about family than just bikes. My wife and daughter tailed me in the car. That was really nice because I didn’t have to leave them for a week. It took a little of the “thrill” out of riding to be honest, but it was great having my girls with me.

The first day I left early with my sights set on Eureka, CA. It’s about 500 and some odd miles so it was going to be a long day. The girls left a few hours after me since they had to drop the cat off at the kennel. I rode up 99, crossed Manteca and Tracy and picked up the 580 toward the bay area. I followed it up through Oakland and then over the San Rafael Bridge. Most of this riding was uneventful highway riding. Once on the other side of the bridge though, the cities start to thin and the scenery opens up, and the ride got pretty nice. I stopped at some small town and had a coffee while waiting for my girls to catch up. Then we went to Santa Rosa to hook up with an old musician friend of mine. We had lunch with him and his family in Healdsburg and it was a really nice visit. That is such a great town. Cozy, clean, and full of great restaurants.

From there we headed up 101 to Eureka. Eureka was pretty disappointing. It’s an old town with some nice parts, but by and large it’s very run down and there’s bums everywhere. On top of that, AT&T had a trunk or something down in the area and so the entire town was without cellphone, internet, and landline service. Really pretty ridiculous.

The next day we left early and headed up the coast on 101 and this is where the trip got really nice. There is so much beauty in the Northern California coast and the Oregon coast it’s amazing. Just one amazing vista after another, and one quaint little town after another. I honestly could have spent my whole week just exploring this area. And in fact, I’m tempted to do that for Epic Ride 2012. We ended the day in Newport, OR, and had some great micro-brewed beer and fresh seafood. And outstanding day.

The third day we continued up the coast for more of the same. Beautiful scenery and neat towns. We stopped in Astoria and this is another city I could have spent a week at. It’s such an cool old city with a vibrant downtown with so much to explore. We cut inland from there, crossed over the river to Washington and picked up the I5. As we were crossing the state line there are huge lumber yards on the other side of the river and I was completely amazed at the sheer amount of lumber stacked up and waiting to be shipped to who knows where. Amazing. We finished the day landing in Bothel at Michelle’s sister Melisa’s house.

Three days of riding over 1000 miles, so day four would be spent relaxing and visiting with family. Melisa took us to breakfast at this cool restaurant that is built into the basement of a school gym that was built in the early 1900′s. They had fantastic food and my diet was shot right then. We hung out at home playing with the kids that day and then in the evening we all went out for sushi in downtown Seattle. Seattle has many unique little neighborhoods and in that way it reminds me of Chicago. It was a great time hanging with my in-laws and enjoying some fantastic food.

On Day 5 Deanna and I suited up, jumped on the bikes, and headed to Canada! I took some relatively remote roads and it was a beautiful ride wandering through Washington farmland to the border. Once there, we passed through relatively quickly and were on our way to Harrison Hot Springs, about an hour and a half east of Vancouver.

Harrison was nice, though I was really disappointed at the restaurant selection at a resort area. Most were closed at 3 in the afternoon and the one we found open was pretty awful. Harrison Lake however was beautiful and surrounding area lush and green. After eating we decided to ride to Hope, BC, and check out something called the Othello Tunnels. They are a series of tunnels blasted through solid rock for the train line. They were built in the early 1900′s and the area is so treacherous that the train line only ran about 60% of the time and now only 4 of the 14 tunnels are open for people to walk through. Very cool place.

The following day we rode to Mission, BC, which is a small town about 30 minutes west of Harrison, and we had breakfast and did a little shopping. All in all, I enjoyed Canada. There was really nothing fantastic about it other than the scenery though, but then we spent most of our time riding through farm country, so it’s hard to expect to find any fantastic restaurants or anything.

On the way back to Seattle, we stopped along the way to meet up with an old buddy of mine from high school. It was really great seeing him and seeing that he and his family were doing so well.

Our last day in Washington was spent with my daughter in downtown Seattle, exploring the market place. We had some fantastic seafood, did some shopping and exploring. Great times, just me and my kid.

The next day we packed up and got an early start home. The plan was to head straight down i5 and travel as far as we could in one day, hopefully making it to Redding, 610 miles south, before I crashed from exhaustion. We made it in 12 hours. That was my longest single day of riding I’ve ever done, and actually, I felt pretty good. We visited with Michelle’s mom for the evening and then once again hit the road the next day.

I decided to leave before my wife and daughter so they could stay and visit a while longer. I made may way down the worst road in the entire United States; Hwy 99. It’s boring, it’s hot, and it’s in AWFUL shape. For all the money this state spends, you’d think they could at least keep the darn roads paved. Anyway, I made it down to Ripon, CA where I again hooked up with some old high school buddies. It was nice seeing these guys even though with all the grey in our bears and hair and all of us wearing glasses, I realized that I’m not a young man anymore. *sigh*.

A few hours later and I was home and it was good to be home because the Fresno heat was wearing on me. Only one problem, I didn’t have a house key. I called Michelle and they were just passing through Sacramento so I had three hours to wait. Luckily I had cigars and my iPad on the bike, so I went to the store for a few beers and some peanuts and spent the next three hours relaxing on the porch surfing the internet and enjoying a smoke and a brew. Not the worst way to spend a day.

So that’s the trip! It was a fantastic ride, not only for the scenery, but for seeing so much family and friends that I don’t get to see often enough. It was a great reminder that when it comes right down to it, those relationships are the most important thing in life.

Here’s a link to my ride pictures. Time to start planning Epic Ride 2012!

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