Yep, BIG changes this week folks. But unlike my main bro-haus Paul, I’m not going to have a big 6 1/2 day countdown or anything. Nope. I just put it right there in the headline. Because that’s how I roll, yo.
Yep, I bought my set of Oster Fast Feed hair clippers straight from Frankie’s Follicle Farm…. alright, (sorry Frank) I lied, I got them at Goodman’s on the internet. But they should be in tomorrow afternoon and then it’s straight to the bathroom to trim my beloved mop of cool down to about 1/3 of an inch. Ahhhh, I can feel the breeze on my wonderfully exposed cranium already.
So you must be asking yourself, “Why, Dana? Why the radical shift in your ultra cool, carefully planned, finely tuned image?”. Well, let me tell you faithful readers. It’s all about the economy, baby. I firmly blame Chevron, OPEC, the environmental lobby, and every soccer mom who drives a Hummer H1 to pick up a half gallon of milk at the grocery store, for my new style doo. Because of you, I have to ride my motorcycle to work because it gets a wicked 45 MPG and I need to save some cash. You didn’t know us bikers were so darn “green” under all that black leather did you?
So what does all this have to do with my hair? Well hey man, I can’t look like a retard when I get to work can I? Nobody likes helmet hair all matted and sticking up in odd places. So I’m shaving it. I know, I know… it’s a shock, but like other hard times, we’ll get through it, together. Anyway, the dude that cuts my hair charges a fortune and so honestly, with the gas savings and hair cut savings combined, I could afford a new bike payment. That’s no lie.
So we’ll see how this goes. Riding the bike to work has it’s own set of issues. I have to pack my clothes and change when I get to work. I have to deal with the near death experiences of my commute fully exposed to the elements (although I did buy some leather pants so that makes me feel a bit safer). I can’t take coffee with me in the morning. I can’t listen to the radio during my commute. I’m making some SERIOUS sacrifices here man!!!! But I’m determined to do it for a full month at least. If I’m miserable after that, at least I can say I gave it a good shot.
So wish me luck! Don’t run me over! And please don’t make fun of my hair.